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Tue, Feb. 19th, 2008, 02:36 pm
lexcorp_media:

All the News that's Fit to Print.

The Lady and the Tiger. I just hope he's housebroken, girl. I wouldn't want that man shredding the drapes, if you get my meaning.

How you gonna keep them down on the farm, when they've had their brains washed, rinsed and conditioned by the best?*

*Any indication of improper behavior by our owner, Lex Luthor, esq, is actionable, and our attorney has sharp, pointed teeth. He files them twice daily. We're just saying.

There's one hard and fast rule when you're gambling: Never play cards with a man with the same first name as a city. Rule number two: Gambling with the Joker means gambling with your life. Just a note: Everyone involved in this story is TERRIFYING, and the Gotham tourist commission can KEEP their advertising money, there's nothing we can do for you.

The only person seen more often than Solomon Grundy recently was Elvis Presley. And even though he's been dead for thirty years, I'm sure the King smells better.